This piece was originally published on The Fix on 12/23/2015:
When I got sober, over a
decade ago, one of the consistent things I would hear at meetings was, “and you
can go anywhere, AA is everywhere”. I
didn’t really understand what that meant in early sobriety, especially since I got
sober in San Diego, a touristy vacation spot for the masses. We had people coming to our Fellowship on
vacation and telling us where they were visiting from; New York, Chicago,
Boston, Minnesota, Texas, etc, and since I was loving my new sober life in my
yogini inspired beach town, I really didn’t have much reason to leave.
However, after being
sober for a while, you get to experience a different kind of life, a sober life and with that comes freedom
to go and do more – specifically TRAVEL.
In my first few months of sobriety the only place I traveled to was
“back home” and for me that was suburban Philadelphia. At six months sober, I was able to
experience an AA meeting in my home town, and besides being nervous about who
I’d see there, it became my refuge. I
felt welcome at the local clubhouse and yes, I saw some folks that I knew, but
that was to be expected. I mean, where
else would these people end up? If not
in AA, then jails, death or institutions, right? This fellowship welcomed me like my home
group in San Diego did and to me that was such a blessing. I didn’t know these people, but they were my
tribe – they got me. Since I would visit
“home” a couple times a year this Fellowship soon became my second home and I
got to know people and names and faces and I could run to these meetings and
share what was happening with me and women gave me their phone numbers and I
was able to forge new sober friendships and feel safe and accepted.
At nine months sober, I
had my first real sober travel experience to Chicago. It was for my brother’s wedding and I had
really been stressing about this as it would be the first time I’d be at an
event with my whole family sober. Mind
you they wouldn’t be sober, but I needed to be.
I was very uncomfortable during my visit there as I was seeing old
friends, meeting new family members and being around alcohol. I needed to make sure I found a meeting every
day to go to. When I found out where the Hotel was in downtown Chicago, I soon
went online to seek out a meeting.
Luckily, I found the local Mustard Seed fellowship and that became a
haven for me. They too were welcoming,
inviting and helpful and I needed that security to safeguard my sobriety during
that time. I was so grateful for those
meetings that weekend.
Since my first year of
sobriety, I’ve been able to go to many AA meetings in other places - Hawaii,
Cabo San Lucas, New York, San Francisco, New Jersey, Baltimore, Vegas, Arizona,
New Orleans and Costa Rica, and that’s just to name a few places. All had AA meetings for me to attend and all
were exactly what I needed at that moment.
When I went to that meeting in Costa Rica, there was only one person
there, but it didn’t matter. He was an
American who had retired in Costa Rica and had over 20 years clean and
sober. We had a mini meeting with just
the three of us (my husband was with me) and he directed us to other local AA
meetings where we could go and meet others.
He and I have kept in touch and he sends me a monthly newsletter that he
sends out to local Costa Ricans.
A few months ago we
traveled all through California; from San Fran, down to Carmel and through Big
Sur, down to Cambria and Santa Barbara and then back into the Fellowship where
I got sober in Encinitas, California - and we hit meetings along the way and
got to meet others that share our common bond.
In Santa Barbara, we attended a meeting that was in a converted old barn
that sat on a 10 acre meditation retreat site. The speaker at that meeting had
an impactful story and one that really touched me. I was able to talk to him afterwards and offer
him encouragement as he was nearing up on his one year anniversary. His story touched me and that was one of the
highlights for me during our vacation - attending other AA meetings, it makes
my trip feel complete and whole and I get to feel connected with others.
During my time in
sobriety, I’ve been able to travel more than I ever did before I got
sober. The freedom I have today is like
no other and one of the best things about that freedom is that anywhere I travel
to in the US, Europe, Mexico, Canada - anywhere
- I can always find an AA meeting and I can feel safe, secure, welcome
and comfortable in my own skin. In
addition to finding AA meetings online, www.aa.org, there are dozens of apps that you can
download to your smartphone that have local meetings, daily meditations,
prayers and other local resources that are easy and quick to access.
We are planning a trip
next year to Italy and the thought of not being able to drink wine during this
trip has entered my mind a few times, but I’m comforted by the fact that I’ll
be able to find a meeting in Rome, Florence or Venice – and that my biggest
challenge will be the language barrier.
But I’m pretty sure I’ll understand the message. And that alone is a gift.
I have gone through
rough times and challenges in sobriety and sometimes I wasn’t close to home to
manage these obstacles and the fact that I always had a place to go to has made
my recovery so much better. I’m better
for the enrichment of going to other meetings and hearing others share their
experience, strength and hope. It’s been
able to get me out of my comfort zone and force me to talk to others. Let’s face it as alcoholics we like to
isolate and burrow and getting out to a meeting where I would know no one
pushed me in ways I hadn’t even thought of.
It made me feel more secure in who I am.
These fellowships welcomed me as if I’m a newcomer, and I am, to
them. They make me feel like I’m okay,
no matter what, and they make me want to keep coming back.
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