Blogging today, even though I'm not really!

So I have to say, I feel a bit inadequate in terms of my blogging, as I don't do it every day, like most of the amazing blogs out there! I'm a bit challenged with my time as I'm trying to keep my FT job and market my Memoir, and run my household and walk Lucy, and be the dutiful wife and take time each day to check in with my friends....so today's blog is my recovery story featured on the Clean and Sober Voice website.  

Check it out - and Happy Friday! 

I got drunk for the first time at age 13 at a teenage drinking party in Avalon, NJ.  There was a large punch bowl filled with grain alcohol jungle juice and I was eager to try alcohol, as it was a constant in our household growing up.  I wanted to be cool and fit in.   But it was never the taste that made me chase it, it was the alcohol buzz.  The effect that it produced was one that I loved and craved. Then, when I tried cocaine at age 16 for the first time and that combination together, it was like BAM! I’ve arrived! Within a few years I was dating a drug dealer and my usage increased.  My 20s were a bit of a blur and wild, but by 30 I had become a “recreational” (3 day weekend) cocaine user and a daily drinker. I also had a thriving career so I was considered a high-functioning alcoholic.  I was able to make my weekend drug use and daily drinking work within my lifestyle as I only hung out with others that drank and used the way I did.  I thought I was a typical “party girl” and weekend warrior.  By 32, I had racked up my first DUI.  I also moved over 22 times during these years and kept jobs for 3-4 years until I knew they’d find me out.  I was able to maintain pretty well.  But I knew I had a problem, I just didn’t really care.  Alcohol and cocaine were the two things that made me feel normal and happiest. 

At age 37, I received my 2^nd DUI in San Diego – a town I had been living in for the past few years – and sitting in that jail cell for 11 hours really made me think and made me think that I needed to do something different.  At first, I didn’t think I’d have to quit drinking all together, I wanted to see what my DUI attorney had to say.  It was highly suggested to go to an AA meeting.  I waited 6 weeks to walk into a meeting and while I was sitting in my first meeting  I knew I needed to be there and I knew that my problem was pretty bad.  I left that meeting and went out and drank for a week – during that week I had my moment of clarity.  I realized that everything bad that had happened to me during my life was from drinking and drugging.  I may want to give the sobriety thing a try.  So, that’s what I did.  I had heard hope in that first meeting and I walked into recovery with complete blind faith.  I had no idea what to expect as I knew nothing about sobriety.  

I got sober the AA way; 90 meetings in 90 days, I got a sponsor, I worked the steps and I did what the woman in recovery told me to do.  I didn’t want anyone in my family or corporate life to know what I was doing, so treatment wasn’t an option for me.   I’m grateful I got sober the way I did and I’m so appreciative of the Fellowship where I got sober.  I wouldn’t change a thing.  AA doesn’t work for everyone, but its just what worked for me.

I’ve been able to live life today free from the bondage of alcohol and drugs.  I don’t hang out in seedy places, I don’t get DUIs anymore, I don’t wake up in stranger’s beds and I don’t have to wonder what happened the night before.  I’m completely free from the wrath of alcohol and drugs.  I can save money and be a contributing citizen to my community and I get to work in a job that I value and like!   I have had so many great things happen in recovery because I make clear choices today.  I was able to get married in recovery and share my journey with someone else who gets me and who is also in recovery.  I rescued my constant companion and dog, Lucy, and she brings me so much joy.  I have been able to maintain and make new friendships – I get to live and participate in my life today.    I wrote a Memoir recently about my experience, strength and hope in recovery and its been able to offer others some hope and inspiration, and that makes me feel so complete and blessed. You can find it on Amazon Kindle.  

“Last Call, a Memoir”  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00TBWNTGU

The freedom I have today is just amazing and the fact that I get to live my life today without lying, manipulating, cheating and stealing is all just gravy to me.  I am just so happy that I don’t HAVE to drink today.  I am a strong supporter of AA and helping others and being of service.  I met my husband in recovery and we’ve been able to run our own programs and maintain our healthy lifestyle.  We recently moved to South Florida and are so blessed to be able to have the kind of life we have today.   We both know its because we are sober and live our lives today by the spiritual principles outlined in the program.

I am grateful I don’t need a drink to manage my life and I’m grateful I’m not waking up with a hangover.  I’m happy that I get to have choices today – healthy choices on who I want to be, not who alcohol and cocaine want me to be.   As Sir Elton John once said in an interview, “My biggest accomplishment in my life is getting sober, its not the grammys, the money, being Knighted or the records I’ve sold, its my sobriety!”

http://www.cleanandsobervoice.com/4/post/2015/04/last-call.html

Who is Gabrielle Glaser?

This is an excerpt from a rebuttal article on Why AA works - "In a story in the April issue of The Atlantic that was posted online earlier today, journalist Gabrielle Glaser harshly criticizes Alcoholics Anonymous. AA and similar 12-step programs, Here and throughout the piece, Glaser is simply ignoring a decade’s worth of science. “No, that’s not true,” said Dr. John Kelly, a clinical psychologist and addiction specialist at Massachusetts General Hospital and Harvard Medical School, when I ran Glaser’s argument by him. “There’s quite a bit of evidence now, actually, that’s shown that AA works.”  

This is just a snippet of what is out there right now on social media after Gabrielle Glaser went on MSNBC with Chris Hayes to discuss "The Irrationality of Alcoholics Anonymous".  And all I can say is thank goodness for NYMag and Dr. John Kelly for their comments to balance out the whacka doo that is Gabby Glaser.  In my humble opinion of course.  I'm not one to say that AA is the ONLY way to get someone sober, its just the method that worked for me. But for some lady, Gabrielle Glaser, to go on national TV  and basically trash AA is just wrong.   It's wrong on so many levels.  Clearly the US Justice System thinks it works as it court mandates meetings for continual drunk drivers, as well as certain drug addicts, but to to question what works for a few million people and throw a wrench into Recovery from a hopeless state of mind and body is just a bunch of phooey! I think we need to boycott anything Gabrielle Glaser says, writes or does, or at least I will.  

How many stories of recovery do we need to hear before someone like dear old Gabby can just put a lid on it.  I too agree there are other ways to get clean and sober and AA isn't a cure-all for everyone, but the damage she, and others in the media, are doing to AA and its Fellowship and the organization cannot be reversed.  AA has been getting a bad rap in the media for a while, at least since Lindsay Lohan was photographed reading a copy of the Big Book, only to go out and relapse soon after.  Hey, I'm not the poster child for AA and How it Works, but there are reasons we have traditions and service organizations and volunteers, etc.  I'm just sayin'. 

I'm forever indebted to AA for changing my life and making it better.  The fact that its the method that has worked for so many years and for so many people should speak for itself.  I didn't think I was one of those "soap box" folks before today.  But, for AA I guess I am. and there it is. 

Thank you Thank you Thank you.........

I'm so appreciative of all the great reviews , "Last Call", has been receiving. Seriously, blown away.  Its been an amazing past few weeks as I've entered into the world of Twitter, blogging, recovery websites and a whole new industry that I hadn't much dipped my toe into.  I've met (via social media) some very cool folks, very hip and trendy, very smart and informative and most of all very encouraging! Isn't that what this is all about? To help others on our journey.  So true and so healing to see all this recovery in others and everyone I've met has been an true inspiration to me...and to others! I am so blessed.  Of important note are two recovery blogs that are sharing my story on and better yet are offering into a glimpse into my book and blog :) 

http://veronicavalli.com/  Veronica Valli is a "Sober Girl telling the World Recovery Rocks" and a therapist (also in recovery) who specializes in addiction. She recently launched her book, Why you drink and How to stop:  Journey to Freedom.  I just started reading her book and I'm graced by her plight to help others as well.  Its all good! 

Also, Chris Aguirre is another recovery warrior who has a site, sincerightnow.com, KLEN and SOBR.  His site features stories, pod casts, twitter feeds, blogs, and the like.  

So thanks everyone who's been a supporter and cheer leader to me along this plight...I'm just going to keep on plugging away.  Just a sample of a couple of recent reviews.....

5 out of 5 stars Life of the Party Girl shares her painful, funny, and courageous journey to overcome addiction!, 

This review is from: Last Call: A Memoir (Kindle Edition)

Couldn't put it down! A brilliantly written, amazing journey thru the eyes of a ferociously funny, courageous women about her personal struggle with alcohol and addiction. The book begins as the Author attends her first teenage “alcohol party” where she is hooked on “the drink” after her first sip. As she navigates the reader into her world of the functioning adult alcoholic, the author uses humor to ease her pain as we witness her life start to unravel. Nancy's ability to tell her personal struggle with this ugly disease of addictions and gain back her power, offers a inspirational tale of recovery. A must read book for any woman who considers herself a "better version of herself" when she is drinking at a party!

5 out of 5 stars A Gritty Account of Addiction, 

This review is from: Last Call: A Memoir (Kindle Edition)

Loved this book! Nancy draws you in, taking you on the journey with her from her first drink to her last. Feeling her pain, shame and frustration. In the end, taking that leap to battle and beat her addictions, I rejoiced in her hard fought/hard earned victory and, ultimately, her happy life on the other side of addiction.

Book has been launched - Now available on Amazon.com!!!!!!!!!

Whew...after a few crazy days of editing and revising "Last Call, a Memoir" it is now live and has been launched via Kindle (or Nook) on Amazon.  This book has been over a decade in the making and I'm hoping my efforts will help someone else.  I'm not looking to make a fortune or to be on Oprah's Book Club list (which would be nice of course) - But I just want this book to be a cautionary tale to young women.  

In November 2003, I was drunk, typing in my journal, and at that time, I hadn’t admitted I was an alcoholic.  I thought I was just a problem drinker – which is also another term for an alcoholic.  I wanted to write about my frustration of not being married and blame it on someone.  In getting prepared to embark on another move across the country, I wanted to find something that would repair the gaping hole I felt inside. I thought that if I had the perfect life of husband, house, dog and child  -- life would work out and I would be part of the suburbia landscape with the general population.  It wasn’t until I got sober that I decided to take control of my life and —be responsible for my actions.  This may in turn answer my non-married question, but it may not.  I wasn’t involved with healthy people, so why should my relationships have been healthy with the promise of any future?    

When I originally started journaling my story, I was a year or so sober and by the time I finished it (and worked with an Editor from San Diego) I was 3 years sober.  I’m now almost 11 years sober and life is in session.  My story by far isn't the most scandalous, or the raciest or the most sizzling, nor did I end up on skid row, its just a story of a gal that liked to drink a lot and have fun, until the fun stopped happening. I remember so many times saying to myself, "I'm just going out for a couple of drinks".  10 hours later, I'd still be awake and partying. I needed the party to end.  

Today life is a bit rosier for me.   I don’t need to be bailed out of a Jail for any DUIs, I know where I am when I wake up in the morning, and I have a little more self respect and dignity than I used to.  This is progress for someone like me.  Just because I’m sober doesn’t mean life doesn’t get tough.  Good things happen.  Bad things happen.  They just normally don’t happen on the same day.  And no matter what, I’ve been able to stay sober through all of it. Its not easy, but as long as I keep doing what I was taught to do by others that walked before me, I know I’m going to be ok.  

So - I do hope you download the book for yourself, or gift it to someone that you think may want to read it or better yet, need to read it.  Maybe your babysitter, daughter, sister, friend of a friend? 

www.amazon.com/Last-Call-Nancy-L-Carr-ebook/dp/B00T6JDLGQ

Launching my Memoir, "Last Call" by next week!

YIKES, just had to jot some thoughts down as this thing is really becoming a reality! Waiting for the final version of my book cover to be competed still.  And I'm needing to tweak my Epilogue and back matter for the book.  So I guess thats why working girls like me have weekends to do this kinda stuff! I hope you all like it and also realize that this is the OLD Nancy, not the current one! Haha!

Check back next week after I launch the book -- its going to be on Amazon, Kindle version! Looking forward to hearing all the good, and bad, feedback!

Bring it!